The truth is, no one likes the truth. We lie to each other. We lie to ourselves. Most people don’t even know they are lying. We don’t lie to be mean. In fact, it is the opposite. We are taught from an early age to not be honest. We teach children it isn’t nice or appropriate to be honest. Don’t say that lady in the grocery store is fat. That’s not nice. Don’t be honest about your feelings. People will think poorly of you. don’t be honest. It will cause a conflict. We should lie to fit in. We should lie to make friends or get along with family. We are taught to lie to get what we want or to avoid punishment. We don’t even realize that we are teaching our children to lie. It is embedded in what we call culture or social norms or manners. We criminalize con artists yet we all do the same thing on a lesser scale. The difference is that the con artists don’t lie to themselves. At least not about lying for their own gain.
It’s one thing to lie to others. It is something else to lie to yourself. This is a defense mechanism to feel better. The level that we lie to ourselves dictates the level of psychological health we have. The majority of psychological interventions are needed to correct abnormal behavior based on the amount of deceit one shows either to themselves or others. Therapists help individuals uncover the truth. Most of the truth we uncover is why we do or say the things we do. Some how finding the truth or saying our truth to others makes us feel better. The reason we have confidentiality when we speak to doctors or therapists is because we are scared. What would our friends, family, or society think if they really knew our truths? We wouldn’t be able to function in society if others knew. We are taught to be ashamed of being honest.
This large amount of lying causes us to feel guilt. This amount of guilt causes us to have an emotional response that is called a defense mechanism. These defense mechanisms are our conscious or subconscious ways of dealing with the lying. When we do this frequently, we start to believe it. Either we justify our actions to feel better, that person deserves it or I had no choice, or we don’t even know we do it. We get so used to lying it becomes more natural of a feeling that telling the truth feels wrong. Anyone who is honest either about their feelings, about others, or about the truths they have discovered become outcasts. Society; views them as having a disorder or doesn’t want to be around them. If speaking the truth becomes a threat either to the government or sometimes religion, these individuals face negative consequences. This further increases individuals to lie to avoid these consequences.
Is the truth the same for everyone? Do we all have the same truth but some people know more about the truth than others? Do we each have an individual truth that is based on our individual perceptions or destinies? Are some people right and others wrong? Or are we all right but just have different pieces of the puzzle? The truth is no one knows the truth. Those that say they do are usually the biggest liars.
We seek the truth based upon what bothers us the most. The truth is we are all missing something. We are searching for a truth that will make us feel whole. The saying that the truth ill set you free has many connotations. If we speak the truth, we feel better. So why does it always seem the truth is just out of reach? Some people think that if we ever discover the real truth (what everyone is searching for-God, purpose, aliens, the secrets or mankind, etc.) that we won’t be able to handle it. It some how is assumed that it either is too complex or too powerful for us to comprehend. Are we just that stupid or inept to understand? Will we ever get our acts together so that the greater truth will be revealed? Do we have to prove our loyalty or devotion? Is there a path that we must follow? Or is it right in front of us but we choose not to acknowledge it?
Path of Totality 
“The truth is, no one likes the truth” is a rather bold statement, especially when truth is like food and water. No one teaches us to want it, but we all hunger for it even though we are all capable of lying on occasion.
Not saying the lady in the grocery store is fat is not teaching a kid to lie. It’s teaching them to be kind and in depth, rather than being shallow and pointing out the obvious.
Lying is human nature. It is not taught.
Children at a young age lie without being coaxed.
-“Trevor, did you draw on the wall?”
-“No…?”
When a parent tells a child not to say something because it isn’t nice, it isn’t because they encourage lying. At least I doubt it’s their intention. Rather, it’s a way of teaching them how to phrase things better, as in: If you haven’t anything nice to say, say nothing at all.
Lying to fit in is up to the person who want to keep fitting in, for fear of standing out. Better to be who you are, than a fake. Nobody likes a phony person. In fact, by standing out – most would find their “tribe” rather than continue to be stuck in a place they don’t belong.
We don’t have to lie to get along with friends or family. Only polite, for the sake of peace. Learning to set differences aside can be hard sometimes, and if so, we always have the choice to not show up if we feel a conflict is avoidable. We always have a choice NOT to lie.
“Anyone who is honest either about their feelings, about others, or about the truths they have discovered become outcasts,” – is also painting society with a broad brush.
There are ways to tell the truth. There are some who use it as a weapon to hurt. They’re usually the ones who love the phrase “Hey, I’m just sayin’…”
And yes, there are also those like Edward Snowden (for example) who has to spend the rest of his life in hiding. And yet, his truth holds great value. He is still a voice that people choose to hear because it is valid. The only ones who reject him are those who wish to continue with their lie.
Truth is the same for everyone. We are born, we live, we die. Some are unhappy, others content. All else in between is just perspective because we view life through different sets of eyes. For instance, we can have an argument, and both sides will have their own version of what happened. But what happened – HAPPENED. The truth is – there was an argument. All else, perspective.
Belief isn’t always truth. It is up to us to scrape away the lies and find out what IS true. Some ARE right, and others wrong. How we choose to see ourselves also goes back to self deception. Are we brave enough to look past the lies?
Not everyone who says they know the truth are liars.
Witnesses, scholars, scientists…people who have encountered something first hand…
Truth isn’t hard to comprehend.
It is the simplest thing in the world, more so than weaving a web of lies. Not being able to understand it or accept it at first doesn’t make anyone stupid. We all have to work on the acceptance of truth from time to time.
Thank you for sharing your deepest thoughts, and I hope this comment helps you along the way. I really hope you find the truth you’re looking for as it seems HONESTY is of great value to you. I found that the first step to honesty, is being honest ourselves. Peace ❤
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